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Lyle Zapato

Mandatory Weird Al: Foil

Lyle Zapato | 2014-07-16.4665 LMT | Entertainment | Aluminum | Food | NWO | Mind Control | General Paranoia
Lyle Zapato

Helicopters Unwelcome In Blythe

Lyle Zapato | 2014-07-04.5725 LMT | Art

Humanoid, quadruped, swirling tire tracks

The Blythe Intaglios (or geoglyphs) are found near Blythe, CA in the Colorado Desert. They include figures of humanoids and tailed quadrupeds that were created anywhere from 450 to 10,000 years ago. Some believe the glyphs represent mythic characters from Quechan history and cosmology, while others see it as evidence that the region is La Cuna de Aztlán, the legendary homeland of the Aztec.

The present is just a continuation of the past; and the site has not remained fixed in time, as modern peoples have added to the messages of the ancients. The most visible additions are the swirling tire tracks that some ethnographers believe represent an Atomic Age creation story, depicting the tracks of subatomic particles first seen in bubble chambers and since sublimated into the collective unconscious of drunk rednecks in pickup trucks.

Then there's this addition, presumably a message from a local paranoid directed at black helicopters:

Helicopter: GO AWAY

(Indirectly via BLDGBLOG.)

Lyle Zapato

Crossing The Border "To Belgium"

Lyle Zapato | 2013-11-10.6650 LMT | Belgian Conspiracy | NWO | Simulacra | Letters

A reader from the Netherlands wrote in with a common question about the Belgian Conspiracy: What happens when you travel from the Netherlands to France?

On 2013-11-10 01:57:37, [REDACTED] ([REDACTED].nl) wrote:
I read your website. There is one thing that you haven't answered.

How come that when I go from the Netherlands to France, I have to take the car for 2h30, to cross a nonexistant thing? I walked in belgium. This thing eixsts. you cant simply walk from france to holland, I tried it!

Sincerely,

[REDACTED]

As you approach the barren, kilometer-wide No Man's Land that marks the Netherlands/France border, EMF devices halt your vehicle and you are subjected to a psychotronic field that renders you unconscious. Black Helicopters then swoop in to retrieve you and your vehicle, delivering both to NWO technicians who place you in a temporary holding pod, in which memories of you traveling "through Belgium" are implanted in your brain.

After a sufficient time, they place you back in your vehicle on the opposite side of the border, start the engine, and wake you. From your perspective, nothing has happened other than a pleasant trip through Belgium.

You can see the No Man's Land and its towering array of EMF and psychotronic generators (which, not coincidentally, look like the Atomium building Belgian Conspirators claim exists "in Brussels") by approaching the border wearing an Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie, which will nullify the somnific effects of the psychotronic field.

However, it is strongly cautioned to not attempt this, since, if discovered in sight of the border while still conscious, you will be detained, sent to the underground Eurodisney facilities, placed in a permanent Citizen Pod, brain-wiped, and made to spend the rest of your unnatural life as a Belgian, at least until your body succumbs to the black-mold infestation that is endemic to the Citizen Pod vaults.

NWO technicians may also, depending on your level of contact with others not in on the Belgian Conspiracy, construct a Simulacra android of you, complete with AFDB, and let it loose on the other side of the border to replace you, tell all your contacts that you saw nothing amiss, and further the illusion that there's a country between the Netherlands and France.

Lyle Zapato

Paradigm Shift Clock Mk. II & Black Helicopter Hood Mural

Lyle Zapato | 2013-05-10.4610 LMT | Technology | Art | Crafts | Mysterious Doodads

Bob Blick, creator of the Pocket Paradigm-Shift Awareness Clock, has upgraded the tech with revised firmware and an additional button:

The front panel button switches the display to show paradigm confidence levels in real time -- caution when it lingers near zero. Reset is inside if you need manual override -- during reset you can preload values with the real time button.


95% Paradigm Confidence. Looking good!

Read more...

Lyle Zapato

Black Hornet Nano

Lyle Zapato | 2013-02-04.8450 LMT | Technology | NWO

As I have outlined here before, the NWO's goal of inculcating in the public an acceptance of persistent, open monitoring (and eventually, punitive behavioral training) by swarms of Nanobiotechnological Black Helicopters involves a process of acclimation whereby new devices are gradually revealed to the public, each iteration approaching closer to the already-existent final form (which has been covertly operational since the 1990s when I first exposed the TRUTH).

Previously revealed devices have varied seemingly haphazardly in size, rotor number and configuration, and degree of autonomy, so as not to arouse suspicion in the orthonoid public that they are being lead down a garden path -- one that ends with a hornets' nest. However, the latest step in this process brings us much closer to that nest.

Read more...

Lyle Zapato

Merry Black Helicoptermas!

Lyle Zapato | 2010-12-24.6230 LMT | NWO

The NWO's inculcation of public acceptance of Black Helicopters wishes you happy holidays:

Lyle Zapato

GPM #24: Your Fellow Soldiers, Black Helicopters

Lyle Zapato | 2010-07-13.7750 LMT | Government Propaganda Mascots | Simulacra

Comics With Problems -- a site dedicated to comic books tackling serious problems, usually poorly -- has uncovered an official US Army training comic from 2001 titled "Dignity & Respect: A Training Guide On Homosexual Conduct Policy". It's ostensibly about the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, but the back cover is where the true propagandistic purpose of the book is revealed:

Heads of diverse soldiers... and miniature Black Helicopters

The modern, diverse US military, made of men and women of all colors and creeds... and miniature Black Helicopters?!

By off-handedly inserting them into this display of soldier unity in diversity, the Army was clearly trying to normalize acceptance of miniature Black Helicopters among the ranks. Deviously, they put this at the end of an otherwise unrelated comic that stresses respecting the dignity of fellow soldiers, causing a subconscious transference of all the social-conformity training from that story onto the subject of Black Helicopters without having to acknowledge they were doing so -- which would have only caused soldiers to ask such existential questions as: Why are there small, nanobiotechnological lifeforms flying around the barracks demanding respect?

When introducing shocking new realities to the uninitiated, it's best to just put it out there and pretend like there's nothing out of the ordinary going on. Most people will be too embarrassed to admit they see something everyone else doesn't and will keep quiet. And for those few who do ask questions, it always helps to have "Just shut up and stop asking questions!" as an official, enforceable policy. Is PFC Choppy a miniature Black Helicopter or is he really just short, hyperactive, and not very talkative? Don't ask! Mind your own business and just respect him as a fellow soldier!

Even more troubling though is the lower part of the image which shows that miniaturization of Simulacra android technology is more advanced than previously thought. If those mesosoldiers were common in the Army nine years ago, how long until the NWO starts introducing microscopic Ken Schrams into our food supply?

Or have they already?!

Lyle Zapato

Black Helicopter Swarm Caught On Video!

Lyle Zapato | 2009-09-24.7270 LMT | NWO | Art

Swiss artist Roman Signer stumbled upon 56 Juvenile Black Helicopters in a room, lined up on the floor in military formation.

Dormant black helicopter formation?

He set up his video camera to document the scene, thinking the helicopters either dormant or as yet unactivated -- that is until they all came to life at once!

Read more...

Lyle Zapato

Cats: The First Line Of Defense Against Black Helicopters

Lyle Zapato | 2009-07-05.4400 LMT | Defensive Techniques | Nature

When the swarms of Juvenile Black Helicopters are finally unleashed on an unsuspecting orthonoid public, paranoid house cats will be at the ready to swat them down.

Below are a small sample of the numerous videos on YouTube showing cats being trained by their paranoid owners to do battle against the coming Black Helicopter menace.

Read more...

Lyle Zapato

The Hexicopter Scuttleth

Lyle Zapato | 2009-03-03.1609 LMT | Technology

A hitherto unseen species of Juvenile Black Helicopter has been found in a New Zealand basement with a shocking new morphological development: IT HAS SIX INSECTOID LEGS!

With the ability to crawl through tight areas normally impassable to spinning rotors, this species of Black Helicopter poses an even greater threat. The common paranoid technique of hanging a jungle of rotor-entangling bits of string from the ceiling will provide no protection from them crawling into your hideout as you sleep and injecting you with BH seed-crystals. If you haven't immediately covered your floors with loops of outward-sticky duct tape upon seeing the above video, I'd suggest you do so ASAP.

(UPDATE: video went missing, can't find copy. Originally via hackaday, with more info.)