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Lyle Zapato

Cats: The First Line Of Defense Against Black Helicopters

Lyle Zapato | 2009-07-05.4400 LMT | Black Helicopters | Defensive Techniques | Nature

When the swarms of Juvenile Black Helicopters are finally unleashed on an unsuspecting orthonoid public, paranoid house cats will be at the ready to swat them down.

Below are a small sample of the numerous videos on YouTube showing cats being trained by their paranoid owners to do battle against the coming Black Helicopter menace.

This anonymous exotic shorthair demonstrates paw-to-rotor combat techniques:

Daisy demonstrates the proper removal of stunned helicopters from vicinity of susceptible humans:

Close-quarters copter-swatting training:

Mimi, Jake, and Elwood practice flanking tactics:

Yuki demonstrates dodging a charging attack:

Lili is an expert at quick strikes:

This cat will not rest until the copter is dead:

Sam demonstrates how to lull a helicopter into a false sense of security before quickly removing it from the air:

Beavis may not be on our side:

And that's just the tip of the furry iceberg of anti-helicopter defiance spreading through the house cat population.

'Your Swat Is Vital' poster

But why cats? Besides their natural hunting prowess and instinctive swatting behavior, cats have a unique resistance to mind control that makes them difficult to mentally subvert using the psychotrons most Black Helicopters carry. As I mentioned in my book, the cat mind is especially obstinate and requires many repeated psychotronic signals to get any effect at all. The worst a Black Helicopter can induce in a cat during the heat of battle is indecisiveness. But with proper training, a cat can be conditioned to strike at juvenile helicopters on paranoid reflex, saving any humans who have come under their psychotronic sway.

As you'll note, all of these cats are being trained using commercially available RC micro-helicopters. These were put on the market not too long ago by the Black Helicopter division of the NWO as a way to condition the orthonoiac public to accept small helicopters flying around their homes under the guise of harmless toys. Little did the NWO realize that the main use of these toys would be train a guerrilla force of feline freedom fighters. I would advise paranoids to buy as many of these toy copters as possible before the NWO realizes the critical mistake they've made and have them banned.

End of post.