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Lyle Zapato

Anarchists March On Tacoma!

Lyle Zapato | 2007-11-11.3940 LMT | Anarchy | Cascadia

The streets of Tacoma erupted in anarchy Friday as 50 masked anarchists meandered around downtown in a leaderless mass with puppets and drums to protest a privately run "concentration camp" on the Tacoma Tideflats. Not that anyone was leading them to protest that, mind you -- they're anarchists:

[T]he group reached Wells Fargo Plaza at 1201 Pacific Ave. during the first march through downtown. The protesters chanted outside the bank's offices before police, who said they were enforcing a request from the business, asked them to leave. An officer talked to [Tom] McCarthy about moving the march on.

A protester wearing a black mask ran up to the two and screamed, "Whatever he tells you, he doesn't stand for us. We're anarchists -- we have no leader!"

"I didn't say you had a leader, man," McCarthy replied.

"Good!" the protester shouted before walking away.

Fortunately for the innocent Tacomans, the rabble of anarchists were held at bay by an impenetrable wall of police bicycle tires. (More Tacoma anarchy photos here.)

Archist rivals from the Anti-Cascadian organization March for America! Washington fielded their own conterprotest composed solely of March for America! Washington founder yelling at people with a bullhorn while waving an American flag. They had sent out a mass email issuing a "call to all American patriots who are able, to stand in solidarity against the communist/socialist/anarchist pawns who call for an end to the nation state, who call for an end to America," but everyone else was busy supporting the nation state elsewhere.

No Starbucks were harmed during the protests.

[REDACTION 2016-10-07: I have removed the name of the March for America! Washington founder as they have apparently changed their beliefs.]

Lyle Zapato

Macroscopic Black Helicopters Watch Protesters

Lyle Zapato | 2007-10-10.1830 LMT | Black Helicopters | Technology | NWO

The Washington Post reports on macroscopic Black Helicopter sightings at anti-government protests:

Vanessa Alarcon saw them while working at an antiwar rally in Lafayette Square last month.

"I heard someone say, 'Oh my god, look at those,' " the college senior from New York recalled. "I look up and I'm like, 'What the hell is that?' They looked kind of like dragonflies or little helicopters. But I mean, those are not insects."

Of course, the government denies that they have unleashed their nanobiotechnological menace on innocent protesters -- in fact, the FBI flat out said "We don't have anything like that" (which is technically true, the UN, not the FBI, is in charge of Black Helicopter breeding, but that doesn't stop the FBI or other NWO subagencies from contracting their services.)

As I reported previously, the NWO has been slowly acclimatizing the populace to accept the eventual panopticonic reign of swarms of black helicopters monitoring our every move. By flying a few of their larger, more primitive breeds over the heads of protesters who they know would report the sightings on COINTELPRO honeypot sites like DailyKos or Wired, the NWO is both further desensitizing people to accept nanobiotechnological agents among us and marginalizing those who complain about them as cranks.

The WaPo article closes with this message of passive acceptance for orthonoids from Ronald Fearing, the memetically named roboticist (and possible Simulacrum robot) of the University of California at Berkeley:

"I don't want people to get paranoid, but what can I say?" Fearing said. "Cellphone cameras are already everywhere. It's not that much different."

You already accept cellphone cameras, why not accept artificial lifeforms controlled by shadowy government agencies spying on you? But, whatever you do, don't get paranoid!

Lyle Zapato

Ben Franklin's New Sexcentequinquagemille-Focals

Lyle Zapato | 2007-08-26.4550 LMT | NWO | Technology

Late in 2008, the US Bureau of Engraving and Printing will issue a revamped $100 bill with a disturbing new feature -- each bill will have embedded in it 650,000 optical lenses.

Ostensibly these lenses are a difficult-to-reproduce security feature designed to befuddle counterfeiters while creating a curious optical illusion:

The lenses magnify the micro-printing in a truly remarkable way.

Move the bill side to side and the image appears to move up and down. Move the bill up and down and the image appears to move from side to side.

To many this may seem an innocent, and even entertaining, new feature -- not unlike the lenticular "Winkin' Lincoln" that I have on good authority will be included on the new $5 bills that will be revealed Sept. 20 -- but paranoids will recognize it for what it really is: a compound eye!

Interleaved among the visible sub-lens-array microprint will undoubtedly be imaging circuitry printed using photosensitive dyes and ferrous inks. The lenses will focus light onto these microimagers and the collected data will be burst-transmitted to the NWO every time a bill passes by one of the RFID sensors now ubiquitous throughout our society. Even though the individual lenses won't be able to resolve detail, advanced interferometric techniques can be applied to the 650,000 data points to generate images sharp enough to spy on the activities of the bill's carrier. Paranoids beware... the bills have eyes!

One might think that this spy bill technology would first be used on $1 bills, since they're more common and already feature the all-seeing eye of the NWO on the back. But $100 bills are the more perversely logical choice for the NWO since they have Benjamin Franklin on them.

Franklin, as paranoid historians and those who read my book are aware, was an instrumental, if unwitting, tool in the creation of the New World Order. Thanks to his involvement in numerous secret societies, including the Freemasons and the Meleagris League (which was a total party secret society, but still...), and his research into mind-control technology, such as his glass armonica (a psychoacoustic device favored by rogue hypnotist Franz Mesmer), Franklin fell in with a bad crowd of cryptocrats and was used to smuggle deeply engineered memetic structures into the documents that would shape the global society of today -- structures whose subtle and unobvious unfoldings have made the machinations of the NWO possible.

And now they're using him to smuggle cameras into our pants pockets. Will poor Ben's indignities never cease?

Lyle Zapato

That's Redactulous!

Lyle Zapato | 2007-06-28.1356 LMT | Random Found Thing

Besides their "Family Jewels", the CIA also recently released lots of other interesting documents, which can be searched through at their FOIA Electronic Reading Room. While some are questioning their heavy use of redaction, if you read the context of the redacted text carefully many secrets can be gleaned.

For instance, consider the document titled "Agency Hosts Movie Premiere and Sneak Preview". It recounts a screening at CIA Headquarters in Langley, VA of the made-for-cable movie "In the Company of Spies", which was filmed on location there. Although they obviously want to keep it on the hush-hush, the keen-eyed will notice that the document redactedly intimates at a highly classified CIA gift shop:

Scanned text

Redactions also hint at a secret CIA house band, whose name is only known to the upper echelon of the Intelligence community:

Scanned text

Given the fevered redacting at the end suggested by the crescendo of multiple, overlapping white boxes, one can only assume that George Tenet's drum solo must have really kicked [EXPLETIVE DELETED].

(Note that the line right before that contains a redaction joke by Tim Matheson. Perhaps the Publications Review Board redactor has a sense of humor.)

Lyle Zapato

Start Hoarding Air Now

Lyle Zapato | 2007-06-15.9450 LMT | Kelviniana | Nature

While (unsuccessfully) looking for an original, full source for Lord Kelvin's dire predictions of an end to breathable air, I found an interesting article from 1901-10-09 in New Castle News, quoted at length from a "London letter". It paints a disturbing picture of the vapory, frog-ruled world that mankind must survive in after peak oxygen is reached:

DESTROYING OXYGEN.

Will the human race and all animal life soon be left without air for breathing? will the world come to an end in the general asphyxiation of every living thing?

Lord Kelvin, the greatest authority today in mathematical physics, asserts that the oxygen supply of the world will be exhausted within the next five centuries.

Oxygen is the real force of the atmosphere so far as man and nearly all air-breathing animals are concerned.

Lord Kelvin has sounded an alarm which has created more discussion in scientific circles than any other pronouncement since Darwin put forth his 'Origin of Species.' No satisfactory reply has so far been offered. It is admitted that, theoretically, the oxygen in the atmosphere is diminishing. Every bucketful of coal in a furnace and every stick of wood in a cook stove burns up a portion of the world's supply of breathing air. How long will the oxygen hold out?

Is there any way in which the extravagant waste of the world's atmosphere can be checked?

Lord Kelvin's conclusions were stated in a lecture recently delivered before the British association for the promotion of science. He has made a study of the subject for many years. He is now past middle age, and ranks as the foremost living physicist.

The following is a summary of the important points of Kelvin's theory:

'The extravagant waste of oxygen by modern manufacturing processes may leave the inhabitants of the earth without air for breathing, and that within a short and calculable time. At the present rate of progress five centuries will exhaust the full supply of the world. This means the exhaustion of oxygen.

'The sum total of oxygen at our disposal is 1,020 millions of tons. Every ton of fuel used three tons of oxygen in combustion. Consequently the burning of 340,000,000 of tons of combustibles will destroy the world's air for breathing. The population of the earth is 1,500,000,000 persons. Each has to his credit 200,000 tons of combustibles. Burn this and we die, not from lack of fuel for keeping warm, but from lack of oxygen for breath. Considering the rate at which manufacturing and commerce are depleting the coal supply, less than 500 years may see the end of the human race.'

Science has rarely offered so strange and so terrible a picture of the end of the world as Lord Kelvin's theory suggests. From various scientific authorities in New York (Hallock, Woodward, Hovey, Van Ingen, Burgess and others) interesting speculation as to the gradual approach of the final catastrophe has been gathered.

With the decrease of oxygen in the air the heat of summer would become intense. This would not be the pitiless, parching heat of the desert. Moisture would hang heavy in the air. Steam would rise from the ground and the sun would be veiled in clouds of vapor.

Plants would spring up and flower in a day and trees grow almost in a night. With time for adjustment, the very luxuriance of vegetation would clear the air again and furnish breath to famished life.

But with the swift rush of Kelvin's calculations the mischief will have been accomplished in three centuries. Alarm will spread too late. As oxygen becomes precious the entire human race will strive madly for some means of increasing it. Every man will conserve his strength, because muscular effort requires the expenditures of much oxygen. Factories will not smoke any longer.

Huge electric plants will distill the seas into air. The banks of the ocean will be crowded with the humanity that comes to it to turn it by alchemy from water to breath. Every year the waters will recede under the drain of electrolyting process.

Man will become more puny with each generation. Death will confront the race and pride of power and trade and achievements in art and learning will give way to a desperate struggle for life.

Certain animals, on the other hand, will thrive apace. Huge and brilliant fishes will swim the sluggish streams. Serpents will grow to monstrous sizes and great frogs will croak in the swamps. All the lower nature may reach its flower again before the death of man, as it did before his birth.

The sturdiest of the human species will survive longest. Scarcely on the last day will the last men be able to distinguish the faces of each other in the thick vapor. They will move about in the dense atmosphere with slower and slower steps. A torpor will creep over them and they will die.

Professor William Hallock, department of physics and secretary of the faculty, Columbia university, asked about Lord Kelvin's theory, said:

'Lord Kelvin's contention rests upon a sound basis. It is true that modern manufactories are consuming fuel in larger amounts than the processes of nature now produce it.

'This combustion locks up practically that portion of the world's oxygen which was freed originally in the slow formation of this fuel through unknown ages.

'If we continue to use up our known supply of oxygen at the present rate, without in some way getting the stock reinforced, then our descendants must die of asphyxiation. But nature may in some hidden way discover a means of increasing the supply of oxygen. There may be sources of supply yet unknown to us. Man may invent an artificial process of freeing oxygen from its combinations. Or, lastly, man may become a cold-blooded animal and capable of existing upon an infinitesimal supply of oxygen.

'Vegetation upon the earth would probably have to be swept away before our supply of breathing air gives out. In that case it is a problem whether man would not starve to death before asphyxiation came upon him. Personally I do not anticipate any such catastrophe. It is one of those things interesting to speculate upon, because it is remote enough not to alarm us a great deal.

'One can always hope that something will happen before worst comes to worst.

'As animal life is now constituted it cannot live without oxygen. Vegetation, on the other hand, lives upon carbonic acid gas, which is useless to animals. This forms the main distinction between animal and vegetable life. Each supports a laboratory which works for the subsistence of the other.

'Fish and other cold-blooded animals live on an infinitesimal amount of oxygen. They use it only in muscular effort. Their body heat is the same as that of the element in which they live. Man, on the other hand, is not content with enough oxygen for this. He lives in a mean animal temperature of 98 degrees. he uses up a wasteful amount of oxygen in keeping his body temperature at 98 degrees. It is quite within the range of possibility that evolution may change this.'

UPDATE 2007-06-22: I have found a reference to Kelvin's original paper ("on the Fuel and Air Supply of the Earth", read at a meeting in 1897) that started all this, but it apparently was never published in full. For more details, read the "On the End of Free Oxygen" page.

Lyle Zapato

The Birdmen of Cascadia

Lyle Zapato | 2007-03-24.0080 LMT | Cascadia | Technology | Antigravity | Paraterrestrials

It's common knowledge that the Republic of Cascadia was home to the first modern sightings of paraterrestrial craft, colloquially known as UFOs. Although the 1947 sighting of "flying saucers" near Mount Rainier is the most famous, that was actually the second sighting following an incident three days earlier on Maury Island that also marked the operational debut of the Men in Black.

Not as commonly known though is that Cascadia was home to some of the first sightings of Unidentified Flying Humanoids (UFHs) -- mysterious individuals employing personal flying devices of unknown technology toward inscrutable ends.

It all started with a curious encounter on Jan. 6, 1948 by Chehalis, Washington resident Bernize Zaikowski (reported here from the Jan. 21 Walla Walla Union-Bulletin):

Chehalis Woman Sees 'Birdman,' Hears Whizzing

CHEHALIS, (UP)—They are seeing things in the skies in these parts again—this time a "whosit-whatzit."

Mrs. Bernice Zaikowski, 61, reported a "birdman" flipping around the roof of her barn earlier this month, could hear a "sizzing and whizzing" and added—"there he was, just 200 feet above."

She said the man had silver wings and appeared to manipulate controls strapped to his chest but there appeared to be no motive power. The wings didn't flap and there was no propeller, she said.

Chief of Police Thomas Murry has refused to investigate and McChord field army authorities, thinking of the flying saucers reports, are skeptical.

Only Mrs. Zaikowski is positive.

Here's another report with more details from the Jan. 21 Waterloo Daily Courier (I haven't been able to uncover a local report or the original UP wire report that these are presumably based on):

Saucer District Now Reporting Wings on Men

Chehalis, Wash.—(U.P.)—The state of Washington, where the first flying saucers were reported, outdid itself Wednesday.

A women reported that she had sighted a "flying man."

Mrs. Bernice Zaikowski of Chehalis said she saw a man with wings attached to his back fly over her barn at an altitude of 200 feet and disappear to the south.

Mrs. Zaikowski said the upright birdman made a "sizzing and whizzing" noise as he climbed and banked in flight, but that his wings neither flapped nor rotated.

She said she could see no motive power such as a propeller either above or in front of him.

Authorities greeted the report with an oblique "Huh?"

But the Polish-born Mrs. Zaikowski insisted she had a good view of the aerialist as he skimmed her barn on Jan. 6.

She said that some school children were with her at the time and ran to the back yard "for a better view."

Chehalis is not for from where the original "flying saucers" were reported about a year ago.

[UPDATE: 2016-01-27] A wire report from International News Service, reprinted in the Jan. 25 Fresno Bee, includes more details, as well as military denials and a refusal by the police to investigate:

Birdman Is New Aerial Mystery In Washington

CHEHALIS (Wash.), Jan 24.—(INS)—A mysterious birdman added today to the list of aerial apparitions that began with reports of "flying saucers" last Summer.

Mrs. Bertha Zaikowski, 61, insists she saw the birdman go "sizzing and whizzing" through the air 200 feet above her Chehalis barn January 6th.

An air force officer at McChord Field, near Tacoma, Wash., said the report "sounded like one of those saucers deals—I just can't put any stock in it." Police Chief Tom Murray of Chehalis refused with a chuckle to investigate.

Mrs. Zaikowski declared the birdman was equipped with big, silver wings fastened over his shoulders with straps. He seemed to handle controls strapped to his chest as he buzzed along.

Acquaintances do not question the Polish born woman's truthfulness. She claimed the "wings" drew near the man's body as he climbed and extended when he hovered, banked or flew on a level course.

She still wonders what made him go, for the "wings" did not flap and she could not see any propellor. It could not have been a one man helicopter, she declared, for the wings did not rotate.

Mrs. Zaikowski said at least five other Chehalis people told her of seeing the man. She said:

There were a lot of small children coming home from school. They saw the man, too, and asked me if they could go into my back yard so that they could watch him longer as he flew toward the south end of the city.

Three months later, more birdmen were reported over Longview, in the direction the previous birdman was seen heading. Wire report reprinted in the April 11 Cumberland Sunday Times (MD):

Motorized "Birdmen" Mystify People In Washington Town

LONGVIEW, Wash., April 10 (INS)—Reports of three motorized birdmen soaring over Longview had the lower Columbia River area agog today.

Two laundry employes said they saw the human airplanes or animated comic strip characters fly over the city without the help of parachutes. In January a similar birdman, singular then, had been reported at Chehalis.

The Longview apparition was reported by Mrs. Viola Johnson and James Pittman, both employees of a laundry. They said they saw it at the same time.

Out Of Sight First

They called other workers, but before they could get outside the flyers were out of sight.

Mrs. Johnson, a 56-year-old widow, said:

"As far as I can judge they were about 250 feet high, in dark, drab flying suits. I'm not very good at judging distance though."

Pittman could not be reached.

Mrs. Johnson went on:

"They had some kind of apparatus on their sides that looked like guns, but I know it couldn't have been guns. They were going about as fast as a freight train.

"I couldn't see any propellers or any motors tied on them, but I could hear motors which sounded about like airplane motors, but not so loud."

Saw Feet Dangling

"I couldn't make out their arms, but I could see their feet dangling, and they kept moving their heads like they were looking around. I couldn't tell if they had goggles on, but their heads looked like they had helmets. I couldn't see their faces."

Other Longview residents reported hearing plane motors about the same time and seeing three planes circle at a high altitude.

The Chehalis report was made by Mrs. Bernice Zaikowski, 61, who said she saw a flying man go "sizzing and whizzing" about 200 feet above her barn.

Mrs. Zaikowski's flying man had big, silver wings and seemed to be working controls on his chest. Neither woman saw a propellor.

Given the timing and direction of their movements, a reasonable conclusion would be that these birdmen were passengers of the paraterrestrial crafts that made their initial incursions into our space/time at Maury Island and Mt. Rainier. However, while it's tempting to assume paraterrestrial, or at the very least the NWO, involvement in these incidents, especially considering the technology involved, this conclusion isn't certain.

Individuals seemingly unaligned with the major powers of the time who use advanced technology to move about are not unheard of. Perhaps the most famous example of this phenomena was Spring-Heeled Jack, a man who gripped Victorian London in a panic over his use of regenerative gait-enhancement technology to escape the repercussions of his mischief by leaping like an oversized flea. Spring-Heeled Jack and the Cascadian birdmen may have simply been their times' versions of hyperinventor John Quincy St. Clair, who is known to teleport himself over distances through hyperspace, sometimes by accident.

[UPDATE: 2016-01-27] On Oct. 30, 1976, Daily Chronicle (Centralia) sports editor Chuck Wilfong wrote a short article about UFHs (or "winged weirdies" as he called them), in which he gives an update to the Zaikowski sighting, claiming that the identity of the birdman had been discovered:

Beware! The mothman cometh

[...]

The sighting caused a minor sensation in the region at the time, with both the Seattle PI and Portland Oregonian giving it a big play.

Such coverage, however, did not exactly delight the Zaikowski family.

"They (the newspapers) made it seem so dumb," explained Mrs. George Zaikowski this week. "She (Bernize) was old country and when she tried to explain what she saw it sounded weird, hard to understand."

Particularly irksome was the fact that, while both metropolitan dailies played up the event, they did not give equal space to the explanation.

The Zaikowskis learned later that the apparition was a man in a "parakite," forerunner to the present day hang glider.

"It was about the time they were trying to find someplace to use hang gliders," Mrs. George Zaikowski recalls. "There were those who felt this area would have been a good place for it."

To Mrs. Bernize Zaikowski, though, born in Poland and used to old country ways, the contraption was something strange.

And it was really. Any flying man is.

While a convincing explanation for the orthonoid, it doesn't explain the fact that both Zaikowski and Johnson heard motor sounds but neither saw a propeller. There is no doubt that various winged personal flying contraptions such as parasails and hang gliders were being openly developed by known parties at the time, but they all used either propeller systems or were silent gliders. None had the retractable wings or chest controls described by Zaikowski.

The mystery of the Cascadian Birdman remains.

Lyle Zapato

Levitating Islands

Lyle Zapato | 2006-11-25.5300 LMT | Technology | Nature | Lost Worlds

ecoEnquirer reports: Levitating Islands in Bermuda Triangle Observed by Spy Satellite. While ecoEnquirer is at a loss to explain this phenomena -- and the usual suspects aren't forthcoming -- I have two possible theories:

  1. Hyperinventor St. Clair, who is a resident of Puerto Rico (one of the points of the Bermuda Triangle), has been quiet recently. Perhaps he is working on a new patent application that will allow individuals or small groups engaged in Chi Kung breathing to create a harmonic Chi resonance, possibly by following a simple flowchart or instructional diagram, thus enabling large masses to be levitated.
  2. The US Navy is testing their superconducting belt technology on a larger scale, possibly as a means to replace aircraft carriers with flying island airbases capable of traveling back in time and stopping the attack on Pearl Harbor.

Whatever the cause, we can say for certain that the phenomena has caught the attention of the giant white arrows patrolling the Caribbean; let us just hope it doesn't displease them.

(Via Reality Carnival)

Lyle Zapato

Certifiably Liminal?

Lyle Zapato | 2006-11-11.1996 LMT | Technology | Mind Control | Crass Commercialism

Have you ever downloaded pirated MP3s from the Internet? If you are like a large segment of the Interpublic, you have. "What harm can come of it?", you have no doubt asked yourself rhetorically, "I take precautions!" But consider this: You wouldn't run pirated software from sketchy sources on your computer for fear of getting viruses, so why would you run pirated music on your brain? By listening to ill-gotten music -- even from paranoid artists you trust -- you are potentially exposing your brain to pirate-added cerebrosonic viruses!

With this very real threat in mind (hopefully not literally), Timothy Raymond Cronin has a simple, patent-pending solution for record labels wishing to dissuade piracy while foregoing unworkable DRM schemes: "Certified protection from subliminal content for recordings".

Record labels can add value, Cronin claims, to authentic, non-pirated music files by certifying them free of subliminal messages. By downloading a legally purchased song from the label's preferred digital distributor, customers can be made to rest assured that listening to it won't turn them into some Manchurian Candidate or cult member. Would-be pirates will think twice before hitting the P2P networks as they become trained to view every unauthorized song copy as a potential vector of subliminal enslavement.

Although it addresses a paranoid concern, Cronin's devious business method has a serious orthonoidic flaw: Who certifies that the label's certification is honest? Since the RIAA branch of the New World Order is known to add cerebrosonics to their music and music players, all this certification would certify is that listeners would be victims of only RIAA mind-control plots. While that does take some of the guess work out of who their puppet masters will be, it doesn't really add much value to the consumer.

Given the obviousness of this flaw, I fear that Cronin isn't acting out of good faith toward the paranoid community and is merely trying to manipulate nascent paranoia in the general public for either profit or mind games.

Radical Sasquatch

HOWL: HUMAN ABDUCTION!!!

Radical Sasquatch | 2006-09-03.5765 LMT | Sasquatch Issues | Cascadia

One of the Humans who built the "BIGFOOT" TRAP in OREGON is now EXPLAINING THE TWISTED MOTIVES OF SASQUATCH TRAPPERS!!! Unlike what I previously heard howl, little Human RONNY OLSON and his CO-CONSPIRATORS weren't planning to kidnap and sell our youth to Human TV producers! No, they had in mind something much more DISTURBING:

"I wouldn't ever want to see Bigfoot held in captivity," stresses Ron Olson. "The idea was to learn about him. We wanted to put a transmitter on him. We wanted to find out how they evade people and where they migrate to."

"We weren't going to kill it -- we had a tranquilizer gun," he explains. "We had a sled built to put him on. We even had big manacles ready if we got one and the tranquilizer started to wear out. We had it pretty well organized."

So their plan was to ABDUCT US, IMPLANT US WITH TRACKING DEVICES, RETURN US TO OUR FORESTS, FOLLOW OUR MOVEMENTS, AND LEARN OUR SECRETS!!! And now the U.S. FOREST SERVICE IS OPENLY REVIVING THEIR PLAN!!!

EVEN MORE DISTURBING, I have learned that many Sasquatch and Yeti have howled that this HUMAN ABDUCTION CONSPIRACY has been going on for DECADES!!! (Could this explain the SOUTH DAKOTA SCHOOL OF MINES CONSPIRACY?! Abductions GONE AWRY!?! Or what about HUMAN EXPERIMENTS WITH JENGLOTS... Could they be developing CYBER-JENGLOTIC TRACKING DEVICES!?!)

HOWL TO ALL HOMINOIDS: If you experience MISSING TIME or find STRANGE BUMPS UNDER YOUR FUR you may be the victim of a HUMAN ABDUCTION!!! You may be SUBCONSCIOUSLY BLOCKING MEMORIES of a HUMAN ABDUCTION if the following photo produces A SENSE OF EXISTENTIAL DREAD:

NIMOY!!!
TYPICAL HUMAN ABDUCTOR!!!

HUMAN ABDUCTIONS are often associated with UNEXPLAINED NIGHT-TIME LIGHTS; these are called "FLASH-LIGHTS"!!! Humans, with their SQUINTY EYES that can't see in the moonlight, use them to get around forests at night!

ABDUCTEES have reported waking up UNABLE TO MOVE while STRANGE HUMAN FACES hover over them! Sasquatch healers have claimed that this phenomena is just SLEEP PARALYSIS and NIGHTMARES, but now we know it is TRANQUILIZERS, MANACLES, and HUMAN ABDUCTORS!!!

If you suspect you have been abducted and implanted, STAY AWAY FROM OTHER SASQUATCH!!! You are leading them RIGHT TO US!!!

HOWL TO WOULD-BE HUMAN ABDUCTORS: It is bad enough that you want to track us and learn our secrets, but if you value your limbs DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT PROBING US!!!

Lyle Zapato

...And Phones Too

Lyle Zapato | 2006-08-09.6930 LMT | Aluminum

The Barry Bittwister Cabal presents a problem:

Your cell phone is tracking you, you know. By law, your phone has to tell where you are within 125 meters when you call 911, which isn't so bad on the face of it. However, the telecom systems can use your phone to track you at any time. In some cases, this can be done even when your phone is off. We're not sure how you feel about it, but we don't like being fitted with a radio collar at all times. This nonconsensual tracking is growing common in the US now, but has been around in Europe for quite a number of years. So what's a paranoid to do?

Their solution? The Invisifier, an aluminum & duct tape sheath for your cell. Its dual-action AFDB/Faraday cage construction keeps psychotronic signals from your phone in and EM tracking signals from the NGA satellites out.

(If I had just waited two centidays for the email I could have included this with the previous post and padded that out a bit...)