Human BBC reporter JONATHAN KENT, who is in Malaysia spying on Hominoids, now claims Humans are HUNTING THE MAWAS!!! AS IF!!! All the pitiful Humans can manage is to obsess over some muddy footprints -- AGAIN WITH THE FEET!!! -- they found on a road! But they are exposing more Mawas secrets:
[Mawas] move around looking for fruits, sometimes they go looking for them in villages. They're also looking for a mate and for salt.
WELL OF COURSE!!! How do you expect Mawas to get a mate without the help of DURIAN MARGARITAS!? They are not as SUAVE and CONFIDENT as Sasquatch! First the Humans drive the Mawas from their ancestral homeland, then the Humans put the Mawas at risk for IDENTITY THEFT, now the Humans are gratuitously pointing out the Mawas' ROMANTIC INADEQUACIES!!! This isn't even perverted cryptozoology anymore, it's just YELLOW JOURNALISM!!!
HUMAN JOURNALISTS, HEAR MY HOWL: LEAVE THE MAWAS ALONE!!!