VIA PNEUMATIC TUBE
Zapato Production Intradimensional
September 29, 2000
To Whom It May Concern:
It has come to our attention that services/information being offered at such sites as www.zapatopi.net/mindguard/ and www.zapatopi.net/afdb/ are in conflict with the intellectual property rights owned by our client, Kortech International Corporation.
Specifically, the computer software program termed such as "Mind Guard" and/or "Mind Guard Ex" (hereafter referred to as "The Illegal Program") violates our client's intellectual property by containing algorithms derived from our client's intellectual property through the illegal act of viewing our client's intellectual property in direct violation with our client's End User License Agreement (hereafter referred to as "EULA", a copy of which can be obtained from the locked filing cabinet in the disused broom closet in the secure bunker under our client's secret headquarters at any time between 10:00 AM and 10:01 AM on workdays by appointment only).
Furthermore, both The Illegal Program and the device (termed an "Aluminium Filled Defective Beacon" and/or "AFDB", hereafter referred to as "The Illegal Device") whose construction is illegally detailed on such sites as www.zapatopi.net/afdb/, are in violation of our client's intellectual property rights as stated in the Digital Millennium Copyright Act since both The Illegal Program and The Illegal Device are designed for the sole purpose of circumventing our client's copy protections, encryption, and/or ability to access human brains (our client's patented business plan, hereafter referred to as "1-Zap Mind Control®").
Our client demands that you cease and desist in distributing The Illegal Program and providing information about The Illegal Device, which infringes on our client's intellectual property, or you will face dire civil and criminal consequences.
If you have any questions, or foolishly believe that you have received this letter in error, please let us know. In the mean time, the above is not a full statement of Kortech International Corporation's rights and remedies, all of which are reserved. We and our client will continue to monitor your activities and will contact you again if you fail to cave in to our demands.
Very truly yours,
(statement does not imply ownership, all rights reserved)
SMITHE & SMITHE
Richard L. Eech