ZPi Logo "Serving the Paranoid
since 1997"
Lyle Zapato

Black Helicopter Swarms

Lyle Zapato | 2006-09-27.7770 LMT | Black Helicopters | Technology | NWO
"We're focusing on persistent surveillance"
—Jonathan How, MIT Black Helicopter engineer

MIT -- the same DARPA-funded institution that falsely claimed AFDBs don't work -- is developing technology that will let Juvenile Black Helicopters swarm.

The UAV SWARM Health Management Project aims to imbue protosentient nano­bio­techno­logical helicopters with a hive mind, allowing groups of them to operate as "an intelligent airborne fleet that requires little human supervision". The technology monitors the health of the quasi-lifeforms and manages their collective consciousness so the swarms can adapt to changing environments.

While the version that MIT is showing to the public uses purely mechanical quadracopters networked to separate PCs, clearly the goal is to integrate the technology into actual nanobiotechnological Black Helicopters so they can swarm autonomously. These press releases are merely an attempt to condition our acceptance of inevitable Black Helicopter swarming in our neighborhoods.

Black Helicopter Swarm. Photo credit: Donna Coveney
Researchers show how Black Helicopter swarms will surround humans
conditioned by the Media to be happy and compliant, making the
round-up and internment of NWO dissenters easy.

Paranoid analysts theorize that eventually this same technology will allow a swarm of Microscopic Black Helicopters to coalesce into a fluid colonial body known as a Metamorphic Ooze Being (MOB). Black Helicopter MOBs will be able to shapeshift into any form, including humanoid, in order to infiltrate paranoid communities.

Although the individual helicopter cells would be black, by controlling the reflective interference of light on a nanometer scale with their tiny rotor props in a manner similar to the scales on butterfly wings, MOBs would be able to make themselves appear to be any combination of colors, thereby rendering their camouflage visually undetectable. They would make Simulacrum androids as we know them obsolete.

Black Eyed Kids
BEKs: Coalesced helicopters?

Indeed, some suspect that MOBs are already among us, disguising themselves as children to gain our trust. Sightings of so-called Black Eyed Kids (BEKs) started in 1996 when journalist Brian Bethel reported that two strange children with completely black eyes approached him in a parking lot and tried to get him to drive them home. Similar BEK sightings followed, almost always involving the children trying to get invited into someone's home. This pathologic need to be invited would suggest they seek human acceptance as part of their infiltration programming. The MOB theory of BEK origins doesn't explain why their eyes would remain characteristically uncamouflaged -- unless BEKs merely represent a malfunctioning tip of a mountain of perfectly camouflaged ooze beings in our midsts.

However, this unsettling possibility is a minority view; the more accepted explanation for BEKs in the paranoid community is that they are otherwise normal kids with massive Parasitic Black Helicopter infections. When children with insufficient exposure to natural allergens are inoculated with Black Helicopter seed crystals by NWO agents, BH reproduction can overwhelm the immune response, causing a thin, black coating of helicopters to form over the entire nervous system, including the eyes.

Whatever the case, Black Helicopter swarms are coming. Invest in swatters.

Tha Stinkin' Pirate

Pirobots!

Tha Stinkin' Pirate | 2006-07-01.7030 LMT | Piratical Yarrings | Random Found Thing

Ferget tha scurvy, Depp'd Pirates o' tha Carrribbean ride, now ye can git yer own pirobotical shipmate...

(I pirated tha video off ah site I discover'd whilst searchin' tha eBay fer booty, but I've lost me map ta tha pirobotmonger's whereabouts. I'm plannin' ta replace me whole crew wit audioanimatrrronics, so if ye be knowin' tha site's bearins', I'd be much obliged.)

Lyle Zapato

Your Portable Mind

Lyle Zapato | 2006-04-27.3710 LMT | Technology

Izumi Arai of Tokyo has solved the problem of death. Naturally, he's applied for a patent:

Mind Personality Transfer Method (#US20020088467)

ABSTRACT:

This invention can permanently in the future develop minds and personalities of creatures which were considered in the past to decay and become extinct owing to ageing and death, by transferring minds and personalities of creatures to new clone bodies, with preserving self-identity. This invention is particularly valid in the case that an invalid has little chance of recovery due to serious multiple organ failures, in the case that general prostration or severe senility of the whole body makes urgent organ exchanges ineffective, in the case that it will not be long before an individual moves to new clone bodies on some other grounds, etc. My invention is the repetitive processes of transferring central nervous systems and other systems of individuals and old clone bodies to new clone bodies.

Besides the process of transferring central nervous systems themselves to new clone bodies, ... by inputting memories retained in original individuals and clone bodies to central nervous systems of new clone bodies beforehand, creatures can obtain existence bases of themselves in succession, because memory itself can be regarded as the independent personality.

Combining freely a great many of organs such as central nervous systems, peripheral nervous systems, and other systems, can enlarge memory capacities. Moreover, by establishing new active pathways, the originality worth of oneself can be formed. Remaking gray matters into chips such as semiconductors, various integrated circuits, etc., makes nervous systems light and convenient. The information interchange between lots of brains beyond a tiny skull and the construction of new nervous systems can evolve central nervous systems as a whole.

Creatures can maintain self-identity even if constituent elements of succeeding creatures are different from those of preceding creatures, because creatures always exchange their constituent elements by respiration and metabolism.

Furthermore, the consciousness of oneself can maintain continuity in the case that the infant self is lasting to the adult self, in the case that a particular self can put on weight and can lose weight, and in the case that the organs of oneself were injured in diseases, accidents, etc., and the self gets one's health back again. Namely, creatures can transfer themselves in succession to new clone bodies continuously and spaciously, even if succeeding creatures have different shapes, sizes, functions, constituent elements, etc.

Therefore, with keeping self-continuity, I can create the existence of multi-arms and multi-legs, by making the most of lots of other systems in addition to nervous systems simultaneously. And, by obtaining various new organs, I can extend individual faculties of creatures diversely and remarkably.

Of course, you're now asking yourself: How will he perform mind transfers from a mature brain to a new one while avoiding self-discontinuity anxiety? Simple:

Putting both old and new brains into operation simultaneously and transferring functions gradually from old brains to new brains make it possible to realize self-continuity as time passes, without anxiety.

...

Fresh brains can be brought up, while coming into subsidiary operation, with carrying these immature brains on one's back.

You'll have a hunch with a hunch! While an exciting prospect, this will cause some inconveniences. Besides complicating AFDB construction, new chair designs will need to be developed to avoid back-brain injury...

Chair device, Fig. 1
Chair device for the allowance of dorsal-cerebral
clearance as a means to avoid neo-neural ensquishment
(PAT. PEND.)

Also, your shirts won't fit right. But considering you'll keep adding more limbs with every new body, you'd probably want to chuck them all and start wearing ponchos instead.

Lyle Zapato

Dubailand Monorail -- Now With Predation

Lyle Zapato | 2006-03-05.6860 LMT | Monorail Danger | Technology

This has disaster written all over it.

City of Arabia is a centrally-planned city being built in Dubai. When finished in 2008, it will feature residential and commercial towers, the world's largest shopping mall, and a canal-lined walk with cafes and restaurants.

While this all sounds very pleasant in a creepy, control-freaky, Michael-Jackson-welcoming way, it's marred by the tragic decision to tie the whole city together with a monorail system. Dubai is inordinately fond of the adjective "ultra-modern", so it's odd that they would choose a hundred-year-old, archaic form of transportation that doesn't even employ tubes. Also, have they really considered the extreme danger posed by spontaneous monorail combustion, what with all that oil they have lying around? (And yet they have even more monorails planned!)

Oh, but it gets much worse...

Besides the towers and mall and whatnot, the monorail will also go through a themepark called Restless Planet, a pluri-Crichtonesque nightmare that will include more than 100 animatronic dinosaurs able to walk and "track visitors with their eyes".

Their site has a breathless video (10Mio) calling it a "phantasmagorical vision", "a palentologist's delight", and "a lay person's formal introduction to the Jurassic age", but mostly shows hapless tourists on foot being attacked by a plesiosaur and T-rex -- until the monorail passes by in the background and the T-rex chases after it!


Animatronic T-rex running alongside exposed monorail track.

In an interview/article last year, Dr. Michael Dixon, Director of London's Natural History Museum and one of the scientific advisors for the park, had these famous last words:

The technologies are all known — tried and tested — so there's absolutely no risk factor at all. This project will just bring the different technologies together and it will do so on an unprecedented scale.

The fools! Not to get all glavin, but if there's one thing that elementary chaos theory tells us it's that animatronic T-rex and monorail technologies should be kept as far apart and on as precedented a scale as possible. Just because the track is above the Tyrannobot's head doesn't mean it will never catch the monorail, even if you program it not to: Simulacra will find a way.

Well, at least now those wanting a vision of the future of American port security know to look to the last half of Jurassic Park 2.

ZPi

POINT/COUNTERPOINT: Monorails

ZPi | 2004-10-22.6570 LMT | Monorail Danger | Politics | NWO | Cascadia

Monorails have emerged as one of the most important issues for Cascadian voters. To help inform people on this often complicated issue, ZPi presents two contrasting view points in the ongoing Monorail debate:

Lyle Zapato

POINT: Monorails Are A Danger To Society

Lyle Zapato, Concerned Citizen

I have mentioned some of the dangers that monorails pose to both passengers and innocent bystanders in previous entries in this space, but I have only surveyed the tip of this iceberg of public endangerment.

For those not following the debate, the known dangers of monorails include: spontaneous combustion of flammable monorail components in fire-accelerating open air; mechanical debris (possibly flaming) falling or even flying off and hitting pedestrians, cars, or nearby homes and businesses; precipitous, and likely deadly, drops for inattentive monorail passengers or those trying to escape flaming cars; monorail tracks that entice children to climb and walk along them with no way of escaping should a train approach (by contrast, surface train tracks allow one to walk safely to the side); increased chance of collateral deaths from chemical or biological attacks due to lack of individual pneumatic encapsulation of passengers; and potential for runaway monorail trains -- unbuffered by pneumatic pressure -- to collide, knocking one or both trains off their rail and onto helpless people below, before bursting into flames. Again, these are just the known dangers -- we can only wonder at what other dangers monorail researchers are keeping from the public.

It's just common sense that placing tens of thousands of pounds of heavy, highly combustible machinery over people's heads while moving at speeds in excess of most surface traffic is a recipe for disaster. So why do they insist on doing it? Monorail enthusiasts imagine a Cascadia converted into some sort of "monorailtopia". They started in Seattle, and now they want to branch outward, sending their elevated tendrils into our neighborhoods with no concern for the safety of our children, senior citizens, or pets. (If dogs chase after elevated monorail trains while craning their necks upward, might they accidentally fall into open manholes and die? Has this issue even been studied properly in the rush to monorailize our nation?)

Although they don't advertise the true extent of their agenda, it is obvious that the monorail proponents' ultimate goal is to link Cascadia to Disneyland -- where Imagineers have already established a monorail hub near their Simulacra factories -- which would allow trainloads of New World Order agents to pour into our nation unchecked. We have to ask: Are the monorail proponents in league with the NWO or merely their unknowing pawns?

Seattleites have always been on the front lines of this battle to secure Cascadia from the threat of monorails. Once again they are called upon to do their patriotic duty by recalling the monorail with a vote of YES on I-83.

The Monorailist

COUNTERPOINT: Mr. Zapato's Anti-Monorail FUD

The Monorailist, Monorail Activist

I must call on Mr. Zapato to cease his anti-monorail FUD. Yes, I said it: FUD. Mr. Zapato is trying to spread Fear, Uncertainty, and, yes, even Doubt, about the most awesome and elegant method of transportation ever devised by Modern Man: the Monorail.

This technological wonder, riding a slender thread of concrete held aloft as if yearning to touch the heavens, winding its way through the metropoli of Mankind's destiny -- of Mankind's destination! What dreams may it hold? What hopes does it carry? Is Fate its captain, or is He merely lounging in the snack car? Equal parts Enlightenment and Romance, Power and Grace, Bus and Train -- uniting all paradoxes into one glorious balance and thereby transporting us to a realm where futurism collides with magical realism, reifying the very Soul of Man in the form of a streamlined metallic tube. No mere people movers are these!

Instead of acknowledging the Monorail's many technical innovations, creature comforts, and its undeniably potent aesthetic grandeur, Mr. Zapato chooses to hyperfocus on and exaggerate a few aberrant incidents that have occurred over the course of the Monorail's long and storied history -- incidents that are nearly all due to lack of maintenance as a result of anti-monorail sentiments that have been fomented by the likes of Mr. Zapato and his Pneumaticist cohorts!

You see, what the public isn't being properly informed here on this biased website is that Mr. Zapato is only against monorails because his organization has developed an "alternative" system of transportation involving pneumatic "tube pods" -- as if you could call such a gaseous pipe-dream a real alternative to the sleek, modern experience of monorails!

If we as a Society -- as a Species, as the very culmination of Life on this planet -- are to mature -- to transcend our present state of existence -- and take our place among the advanced peoples of the Galaxy -- to be born again as Star Children, eyes opening on a New Dawn -- then monorails are inevitable. Is it going too far to suggest that monorails might be the Singularity? Perhaps. But it is the logical next step in our evolution and we cannot risk not taking it. However, instead of advancing forward with the certainty fitting our eons of history, Mr. Zapato would have us retreat -- to revert to a state not unlike that of the primordial tube worms. We are better than this; we will be better than this.

I strongly urge the people of Seattle to take a bold step into our Future by voting NO on I-83. Remember: Vote NO to say YES to monorails and NO to pneumatic tubes and YES to the Transcendence of Humanity -- for Tomorrow and Forever!

Lyle Zapato

GPM #4: California's Bill, A Bill

Lyle Zapato | 2004-09-02.4260 LMT | Government Propaganda Mascots | NWO

Not all propaganda comes from the national level. For instance, the California State Assembly presents a kids game called Your Idea Becomes A Law, the premise of which is:

In California anyone of any age may suggest an idea for a new state Law. Maybe your ideas could make good state laws.

That's right, kids. We need more laws! After all, what good is government if it doesn't do lots of governing? And what better way to govern than to have endless rules and regulations that dictate our every behavior? California, in particular, is so desperate for ideas for new laws that they want you to send your suggestions, no matter how wacky they may be.

Bill, a bill

The propaganda here is nowhere near as sophisticated as it is on the Federal level and looks like it was thrown together by an Assembly intern. However, there are a few mascots for us to consider. First there's Assembly Member Grizwald "Grizz" LeBear, who, unfortunately, is not a bear, but rather a generic clipart business person. He hears your suggested law, thinks it's an excellent idea (no matter what you suggest), and introduces it as a bill. The next mascot we meet is Bill, a bill, who is even more crudely drawn than named. Later on he dons a cape and gains flying powers, but it's less exciting than it sounds. Next comes two Assembly Committees (choose at random -- it doesn't matter if they are unrelated to your proposed law), both of whom are represented by the same photo circa the 1980s. Following in short order is the Assembly itself, also apparently unchanged since the Deukmejian administration. (Game cheat: you need 41 votes in the Assembly to pass.) Next stop, The Senate (not pictured -- I sense bad blood with the Assembly).

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Finally, the last mascot we meet is the most effective cartoon here: the Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger (whose picture is oddly 3D -- just watch his jaw follow you). As some of you know, Schwarzenegger is a Simulacrum -- a humanoid cyborg created by NWO Imagineers to replace troublesome humans and serve as propaganda delivery platforms in movies and newscasts. He is perhaps their most sophisticated animatronic creation and represents their concept of the ubermensch. (The Belgian Conspiracy within the NWO had been pushing the Liberati leadership to use their knock-off cyborg, Jean-Claude Van Damme, instead, but apparently they didn't have enough clout.) They have been grooming Schwarzenegger for use in a political context since the '80s while conditioning the public to accept him. Note how he is famous for playing an android, thereby cleverly defusing any attempt to reveal his true Simulacrumatic nature. Also note how his Terminator character started out as evil, but then became a hero and father figure, a classic bait-and-switch tactic designed to condition us to accept and even welcome Simulacrum governance. Now that he has been installed as Governor of California -- conveniently near the major Imagineer service center in Anaheim, should he or his wife (actually a refurbished Schwarzenegger prototype adopted by the Kennedys) suffer malfunctions -- they can employ him in propaganda such as this game, confident in the knowledge that children of any age will trust any bill this lovable killing machine signs into law.

So, back to the game. Will your bill survive this gauntlet of officials designed protect the public interest by weeding out the bad laws? Yes, it will... because every bill you suggest in this game becomes law. You see, the message here is that it doesn't matter what the law is; as long as it gives the government some excuse to govern you, it's "good state law."