Back in February I received an inquiry from Pakistan about purchasing "Aluminum Lead Tin Foil" (one of numerous such inquiries ZPi receives due to our high search-engine placement for "aluminum".)
Well, this morning I got an email from a representative of a metals company in India who had read the above post and wished to contact the original correspondent to offer a quote. I've sent them each other's contact info. Hopefully they can make a deal and provide more grassroots ties between the two adversarial nations, thereby lessening regional tensions and creating a global example that will eventually lead to world peace. All thanks to ZPi!
We here at ZPi are all about leveraging international misunderstandings of websites to spread peace through economic co-dependence. I'm pretty sure we've always been about that. Yes. And with that in mind...
Someone else in India is looking for "Aluminum Foil stand-up pouch(es)" in various sizes, both plain and Ziplock. Any Pakistanis, Chinese, or anyone else that can hook them up, let me know and I'll get you in touch.
UPDATE: I've also got an Egyptian who is looking for 3 tons of triplex aluminum foil printed in one color ("for INDOCID SUPPOSITORY 100 MG") and another 3 tons of same unprinted. The foil should be 45 microns thick, coated inside with PE 20 microns and outside with PP 18 microns, width 58mm, printed on one side (on Polypropylene SID). This is your chance to bring peace to the Middle East. Don't let it slip away.
INTERNATIONAL HOMINOID HOWL has forced the JOHOR HUMAN GOVERNMENT to RECOGNIZE FUNDAMENTAL HOMINOID RIGHTS:
...The Johor Government has announced total [SIC!!!] protection for the Bigfoot [SIC!!!], as a State heritage [SIC!!!], which cannot be injured, captured, transported out of the State or killed.
HOWEVER!!! Not only are they PATERNALISTICALLY claiming that Mawas belong to the HUMAN-CONTROLLED STATE, they are STILL REFUSING TO RELEASE THE CAPTURED MAWAS CUB OR EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR ROLE IN THE KIDNAPPING!!!
FURTHERMORE!!! While they claim to recognize that HOMINOIDCIDE and other crimes are wrong, they are not recognizing the FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT TO HOMINOID PRIVACY!!! According to the cryptopervert group "Bigfoot Research Organization" -- BFRO!!! -- Malaysia is building an UNPRECEDENTED SURVEILLANCE STATE aimed at GATHERING COUNTER INTELLIGENCE on innocent Mawas and threatening to leak sensitive information to the HUMANIST MEDIA to BLACKMAIL MAWAS DISSIDENTS:
Malaysia is the only country that attempts to collect information on sightings from its citizens. Although sightings and track finds are not frequent, the Malaysian Government is still the only government in the world that will not hesitate to disclose any sighting information to the media.
THERE IS NO FREEDOM FOR MAWAS UNDER HUMAN RULE!!! Working within the HUMAN-CONTROLLED SYSTEM is no longer an option! An independent Mawas Nation is the only solution!
HUMANS, HEAR OUR HOWL: FREE MAWASISTAN!!!
MORE SHOCKING HOWLS ABOUT THE HUMANS WHO SHOT AND KIDNAPPED A MAWAS CUB IN MALAYSIA!!! EVIDENCE OF HUMAN GOVERNMENT INVOLVEMENT AND COVER-UPS!!!
Human witnesses squeak that last month TWENTY HUMANS in a "TRUCK" with WILDLIFE DEPARTMENT markings stopped at their rest area to barter for food! Some of these truck Humans squeaked to Human female witnesses that they had a MAWAS CUB in their truck which they had SHOT WITH A SLEEPING STICK!!! They offered to show the Human females the cub, but the truck Humans left as the females approached!
The WILDLIFE DEPARTMENT denies having anything to do with these truck Humans, who they are now insensitively calling "BIGFOOT POACHERS"!!! They are even insinuating that the Human females made the story up -- but other Humans also squeak that they have seen the truck Humans and ONE EVEN PEEKED INSIDE THE TRUCK'S TINTED WINDOWS AND SAW THE CUB!!! MORE GOVERNMENT COVER-UPS!!!
Human researcher VINCINT CHOW has broken ranks with the official state line I howled about previously! He squeaks that THERE IS NO HUMAN LAW AGAINST SHOOTING AND KIDNAPPING MAWAS:
"The Bigfoot, which has been frequently sighted at the fringes of the jungle here recently, has not been placed on the State's list of endangered species and no law has been drawn up to protect them.
"This is a dangerous situation and if nothing is done, the Bigfoot population in our [SIC!!!] jungles could be wiped out," [THE HUMAN] said.
THE MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT CAN'T BE TRUSTED!!! Their TRUCK AGENTS are KIDNAPPING MAWAS and HOLDING THEM CAPTIVE, presumably in SECRET STATE-RUN PRISON CAMPS!!! They are obviously trying to howl a signal to MAWAS DISSIDENTS who oppose MALAYSIAN HOMINOID OPPRESSION to keep quiet or their CHILDREN WILL BE TAKEN FROM THEM!!!
Cascadian Sasquatch join with the Mawas and all other Hominoids in howling for the MAWAS CUB TO BE RETURNED UNHARMED or there will be GLOBAL HOMINOID MAYHEM!!!
HOWLS ARE SURFACING THAT MALAYSIAN HUMANS HAVE SHOT AND ARE HOLDING CAPTIVE A MAWAS CUB!!! The Human government in Johor is denying these claims! I SMELL A COVER UP!!!
The Johor Humans, obviously trying to distance themselves from the INEVITABLE MAWAS RAMPAGE should this howl turn out to be true, are squeaking that SHOOTING MAWAS IS ILLEGAL, as is KIDNAPPING MAWAS and taking them out of Mawas territory! HOWEVER, the Johor Humans are still claiming that they have the right to give permission to do these things! THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!!
MAWAS ARE NOT SUBJECTS OF THE HUMAN GOVERNMENT!!! With all that is going on in Malaysia, it is becoming more and more clear that Mawas need to RISE UP AND DECLARE A SOVEREIGN STATE as was done by the Migoi in Bhutan! A FREE AND INDEPENDENT MAWASISTAN IS THE ONLY SOLUTION TO END THE ANTI-HOMINOID OPPRESSION AT THE PAWS OF THE HUMAN CONTROLLED MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT!!!
This BOLD HOWL TO ARMS may seem RADICAL to my fellow Cascadian Sasquatch, since we are able to live mostly unbothered by the Humans in our midst, but the ANTI-HOMINOID SITUATION outside of Cascadia has been growing INCREASINGLY DIRE lately -- EVEN WITHIN A BOULDER'S THROW OF THE CASCADIAN BORDER!!! To the north in the YUKON, a cryptopervert Human has started a SASQUATCH DETECTIVE AGENCY to dig up dirt on local Sasquatch leaders to DISCREDIT THE HOMINOID RIGHTS MOVEMENT!!! And of course there was the HAPPY CAMP kidnapping threats last year in occupied Southern Cascadia! UNLESS CASCADIAN SASQUATCH SUPPORT THE STRUGGLES OF OUR HOMINOID BROTHERS AND SISTERS AROUND THE WORLD, WE MAY YET SEE THIS KIND OF ANTI-HOMINOID OPPRESSION HERE!!!
IN OTHER HOWLS: Not all Malaysian Humans are anti-Hominoid! A nice little Human industrial designer in Malaysia has created a first-of-its-kind "WHEEL-CHAIR" for Hominoids! (ALSO HERE!!!) A WHEEL-CHAIR is a sitting thing with WHEELS -- those flat turny things that Humans like so much that roll like boulders! Crippled Hominoids can use the WHEEL-CHAIR to move about the forest and forage unaided by family members! No howl yet on how much the WHEEL-CHAIR will barter for, but Homedicare should cover it!
(Note though that the study was conducted by "Belgians", so assume some devious angle is involved.)
Previously: Come nuclear armageddon, also expect a statistical increase in the paranoid population.
Intrepid octopus investigator risk sasquatch eating, discover secret human program to follow, spy on octopus with ROV-like robot. Human document admit intent:
...We want to design a mini-robot that will carry a video camera, follow an octopus around under the water, and always keep the animal in the camera's viewfinder. Since the robot will act like a Private Eye and tail the octopus everywhere, we think it should be called Shadow.
Human ROV casing octopus home? Human ROV take salmon information box? Evidence conclusive: octopus not senile. Octopus innocent victim of vast human burglary conspiracy. Human caught in act, engage in cover up. Watergate! Watergate! Watergate!
Octopus victim responds to new accusations:
Lies! Lies! Lies!
Anti-octopus bias in human media. Truth here.
Octopus awaken by yellow intruder stealing salmon information box. Intruder attack octopus, take property. Octopus not senile. Octopus have no interest in mating with yellow armless thing. Octopus only want box back.
Give octopus box back!
Cephalopod, crustacean, nudibranch unite in protest: "Things on seafloor ours!"
Anti-Defamation Leagues Under The Sea demand human apology, give box back.
Salmon call for independent investigation, cite "Human-Octopus Axis of Evil".
The Tamil Nadu Government is now claiming they went with a monorail because they feared a Chennai earthquake. Obviously, when the Big One hits, the best place to have multi-ton metal vehicles is balancing over the heads of pedestrians (not safely ensconced in pressurized, quake-resistant underground tubes).
Also, after a government assembly where critics were denied the ability to raise questions, PMK member G. K. Mani revealed that the monorail "bogies" the government plans to purchase are currently sitting abandoned in Malaysia. It's unknown at this time if they're in the same state of disrepair as the ones found in France, but considering how desperate Lava is to unload them, it would be wise to check the cars for vagrant orangutans before signing for them.
© 2004-2017 Lyle Zapato & ZPi
unless otherwise noted or implied.