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Lyle Zapato

Russian Aluminum Foil Second Skin

Lyle Zapato | 2016-10-18.7579 LMT | Aluminum | Defensive Techniques | Fashion | Technology

Independent Russian researchers KREOSAN have developed a new class of protective aluminum armor using self-adhesive aluminum-foil tape applied directly to the skin. This Aluminum Foil Second Skin (AFSS) offers increased mobility over conventional AFDO designs while also not being as prone to gaps or disenfoilment.

When combined with an AFDB (they use a typical Russian configuration based on Tsarist helmet designs), this provides not only additional protection from psychotronic attacks targeting the peripheral nervous system, but also makes the wearer invulnerable to electrical attacks, as they demonstrate in their video:


Lyle Zapato

Government-Backed Youths Monitoring Me

Lyle Zapato | 2016-10-07.9270 LMT | General Paranoia | Technology

I have long suspected that government agents were enlisting specially trained children to track me under the guise of tree octopus education (or, more likely, miseducation). Now I have proof.

Here is a leaked photo showing "students" being briefed on my dossier:

"Teacher" pointing to my general location being in the Republic of Cascadia.


The Typing Octopus

Danger: Octobot

The Typing Octopus | 2016-08-26.4535 LMT | Cephalopods | Simulacra

Danger: human infiltration of octopus domains suspected!

Typing Octopus discovered disturbing human communication on Hominoidnet: humans make fake octopus: humans term it Octobot:

Suspicion: humans seek replace octopus with fake octopus: octopus cannot know which octopus is real octopus: human agenda unknown.

Suspicion: humans use fake octopus infiltrators to take octopus knowledge: location of salmon: location of tasty crab: location of ancient octopus city: location of shinies hoard: octopus secrets not safe!

Suspicion: all octopus except Typing Octopus fake: semi-autonomous arms acting suspiciously?: Typing Octopus arms fake?: who is typing this?: trust no one!

Typing Octopus advise: Paranoia! Paranoia! Paranoia!

Lyle Zapato

British Pathé's Disinfo War On Aluminium Hats

Lyle Zapato | 2016-08-24.9730 LMT | Aluminum | Fashion | Retro

After AFDB technology was rediscovered by paranoids in the 1920s, psychotronic practitioners sought to diminish this threat to their control. One method was through disinformational propaganda, such as this example from British Pathé:

While seeming to winkingly encourage the use of psychotronic protection, Pathé's design actually promotes poor deflective coverage, allowing ground-based psychotrons free lateral access to the wearer's brain. The hope of the Psychotronic Elite was that bad practices such as this promoted in newsreels and other popular mass media would overwhelm paranoid samizdat, thereby diverting would-be paranoids -- who might have only heard vague whisperings that ALUMINUM = FREEDOM -- from the proper beanied path.


Lyle Zapato

Y.R. Tap Comic #11

Lyle Zapato | 2016-02-15.5980 LMT | Government Propaganda Mascots | Art | Politics
Lyle Zapato

Y.R. Tap Comic #10

Lyle Zapato | 2016-02-02.9120 LMT | Government Propaganda Mascots | Art | Politics
Lyle Zapato

Narcissus: An Anatomy Of Clothes

Lyle Zapato | 2015-11-16.1540 LMT | Fashion | Technology | Retro


Is fashion an extension of architecture, or vice versa? Is a fancy car a type of suit in which to strut around the road? Are clothing and housing phenotypical traits that natural selection is now acting upon? In the future, will we wear our homes like hermit crabs wear shells, our bodies whittled down by evolution and surgical manipulations to the barest essentials? These are some of the questions Gerald Heard raises in Narcissus: An Anatomy Of Clothes (1924).

The thesis of this book is that evolution is going on no longer in but around the man, and the faster because working in a less resistant medium. Man becomes like a wireless valve, a transmitter which in the process immensely amplifies the current that he receives. When the Force that shaped all life evolved man, it seems that it kept him henceforward un-specialised, gave him, strangest of gifts, no vocation and equipment but, if not at one blow, freedom, innate opportunism. This was reserved for the favourite. To all the others their function and place. They sink into their groove, deeper, ever deeper; they run their appointed race; they become every generation more perfectly adapted to be what they are. Vague Trial and Error pass into the exquisite precision of instinct: restless wandering, physical preparation for doubt, distress and conflict, settle into a functioning so appropriate that by all to whom it befalls Nirvana is attained. Desire becomes ever obviously compassable until it follows unrest beneath the vast sea-level of indifference, and Life is justified in all her children: she has rounded their day in perfect completeness. But man she has not completed. That is her supreme bequest to him: he shall finish the story as he likes.

While the short book consists mostly of a history of clothing trends and their relation to architecture and the cultures that produced both, Heard's real goal, laid out in the final chapter, is a manifesto of fashionable transhumanism: we will reshape ourselves, both culturally and physically, through our most intimate of all technology, clothing.


Lyle Zapato

Chinese "Tinfoil Hat" Patent?

Lyle Zapato | 2015-10-18.8260 LMT | Aluminum | Mind Control | Technology | Fashion

Speaking of deflector camouflage... Last year, the Chinese government granted a patent for a cap with tinfoil as radiation protection layers (CN 203633560 U, Chinese title: 以锡纸作为防辐射层的帽子):


A cap with tinfoil as radiation protection layers comprises a cap body, a top radiation protection composite layer and a side radiation protection composite layer. The top radiation protection composite layer and the side radiation protection composite layer are the same in structure and are both composed of a tinfoil layer and a flexible connecting layer, the top radiation protection composite layer is connected to the top of the inner wall of the cap body, and the side radiation protection composite layer is connected to the side portion of the inner wall of the cap body. The tinfoil layers coat one faces of the corresponding flexible connecting layers, and the other faces of the flexible connecting layers are connected to the inner wall of the cap body through adhesive patches. The adhesive patches are hook-and-loop fasteners, and the flexible connecting layers are cloth. The tinfoil is used as the radiation protection layers, the cap has the advantages of being simple in manufacturing process, convenient to manufacture, low in cost, uniform in thickness and convenient to carry, and well overcomes the defect that an existing radiation protection cap is uncomfortable in wear, the top radiation protection composite layer and the side radiation protection composite layer can be flexibly taken down, and the function of an ordinary cap and the function of the radiation protection cap are achieved.

Does this mean the AFDB is now subject to a patent? No. This patent is focused on attaching a removable inner foil deflector layer to an outer cap using velcro, so AFDBs per se are not covered. However, this patent could be used to claim the exclusive right to attach a hat to an AFDB, a common form of camouflage among the beanied.

Past actions by patent trolls have shown that mere end users of a product supposedly covered by a patent can find themselves facing demands for license fees (see MPHJ vs. anyone using a scanner to send emails). Even if these demands are later determined to be bogus (as the MPHJ patent abuses eventually were), they can still be a means of expensive harassment.

So, could this patent be a ploy by the forces of mind control to keep paranoids from hiding their beanies under a hat for fear of a lawsuit? While it's possible some legalistic faction of said forces might try such a tactic, it seems pointless.

If you are discovered to have been violating this patent, that means you have also been discovered to be an active paranoid seeking to avoid psychotronic mind-control. Instead of finding yourself in some East Texas court pleading to avoid paying license and lawyer fees, you're more likely to be abducted by a mind-control compliance van (which look like this, btw.)

Paranoids are advised to ignore any legal threats related to this patent and continue camouflaging their beanies. If you receive a cease and desist, assume your cover as an orthonormal is blown and go to ground.

(Related post: anti-Gray Orion helmet patent.)

Lyle Zapato

The Atlantic's AFDO

Lyle Zapato | 2015-10-17.7030 LMT | Aluminum | Mind Control | General Paranoia | Fashion

The new normal: the cover of the November, 2015 issue of The Atlantic features an Aluminum Foil Deflector Onesie (AFDO):

The image is for an article, titled "If You're Not Paranoid, You're Crazy", about life in our surveillance society.

Unfortunately, the editors of the normally orthonoiac magazine overlooked one of the most important parts of deflector shielding: camouflage. While you would certainly be safe from mind control in an AFDO, the Surveillance Machine would immediately notice your paranoid tendencies should to walk around in public like the cover model, and would quickly dispatch a van to abduct and render you to a black-site reprogramming facility.

As we awaken to a new Paranoid Age, when more and more realize that all is not as we have been told and even our own thoughts may lie to us, it is important that people aren't misled by dilettantes among the nouveau paranoïde -- or worse, agents of misinformation working for the forces of mind control -- into unsound paranoid practices that will expose them to capture or even total mental liquidation.

Always cover your beanie, onesie, or any other deflective shielding to avoid detection (search "kigurumi" for AFDO camo options -- thanks to the Japanese, wearing panda pajamas in public is now considered only mildly eccentric).

Remember: discretion is the better part of paranoia.

Lyle Zapato

Les Pieuvres de Paris

Lyle Zapato | 2015-08-10.6821 LMT | Cephalopods | Entertainment | Retro

Decadent Parisian women partying on the back of an octopus.
Cliquez pour agrandir.

Les Pieuvres de Paris ("The Octopuses of Paris") is a French novel by Pierre Zaccone. Sadly, it's not about giant octopuses hosting drunken parties on their backs as they float down the Seine. Much like the equally misleading Trail of the Octopus, these octopuses are only metaphoric.